luckylove: (Default)
Dear Scottish Gas,
For the umteemth time, Miss J M Clinton DOES NOT live at 2/2. I think she lives at 2/4. Please stop sending her gas and electric bills to 2/2. I was kind enough to redeliver the first two. I even wrote on them to point out the mistake and give her a chance to correct it. Since she hasn't or you've failed to do this, I've been returning them to sender with a message saying that she doesn't live at 2/2 and why don't you try 2/4. In the past two days I've three letters for her from yourselves. Piss Off. She doesn't live here. She's never lived here. This property is supplied by Scottish POWER and I have the bills to prove it. Any further communication to her will either be given to my hamster for shredding or put in my to do pile which means it may take 18 months for me to do anything with it.
Now fuck off and leave me in peace.
No love,
Lauren
p.s. No I can't talk to her. Our last interaction involved the police at 4am warning her to turn the bloody volume or risk an ASBO. Because of this I'm reluctant to have any further contact with her.


I've actually written something similar to this on the envelope that I shall be returning to them. I'm tempted to put the three items into another envelope and include this letter and post it to their undeliverable address without postage. Not My Problem.

Dear friends list,
Why do several different items for several different people in my stair all come to 2/2? For once it's NOT Royal Mail's fault. Items from the Dogs Trust for Miss C H in 2/7 with the address 2/2. Items from Carphone Warehouse, for a Mr F, who I think lives in 2/5, come with the address 2/2. Items for a Mr D, actual address unknown, also come addressed to 2/2. What the fuck is going on? If it weren't for the fact that I know three of the four people actually live in this stair I'd be inclined to think there was some sort of fraud going on.
luckylove: (Cactus double)
Dear OK-Mail, Webbrands, IPT Limited.
My name is not Mr. Belinda Carter and my DOB is not 13th December 1976.
Now FUCK OFF AND DIE.
No Love,
Me.
p.s. May the fleas of a thousand syphilitic camels infest your arseholes after said arseholes have been rogered by giant cactii.


WebBastards and OK-Fail appear to be owned/run by Interactive Prospect Targeting Limited.

From my experience, and the experiences of others, their Unsubscribe option does not work.

I first thought it was Cadman Fine Wines who'd signed me up with this lot but I may be wrong. This person reckons it's cd-wow.com. Cadman Fine Wines ain't in the clear yet. I refuse to believe it's a coincidence that the level of spam to hit the email address they failed to unsubscribe three times* has increased 10-fold since I complained to them. It can't be cd-wow. They know my real name. Now I'm convinced it's Cadman Fine Wines.

I'd love to set up different email addresses for each website I sign up to. Finding out who is selling on email addresses sounds like fun. I almost wish I could be arsed doing it. Oh well, I'll settle for writing to IPT Limited.

The website for those pissed off with WebBrands bastards

New letter.
Dead Cadman Fine Wines,
See that bit about fleas and cactii . . .
Enjoy :)
No Love,
Me


*yes they emailed me yet again. I didn't get round to posting here because I was rather upset about something else.
luckylove: (Nirrti Zat)
The Russians have Livejournal.

They'd better not fuck with my permanent account.

Edit: I think I'll be using ljArchive on a daily basis now.
luckylove: (Emo Lawn)
The Herbal Essences free haircut offer is a fucking waste of time if you live anywhere in Lothian. Our nearest participating 'salon' is in Glasgow and they insist on you agreeing to pay a £30 'no show' fee if you don't turn up. So if Scotrail/citylink fuck up and you don't arrive on time you are royally screwed. They can all rot in hell.

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